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Tuesday, October 31, 2006

It's what I get for watching TV

Thoughts while watching a television commercial:

A bunch of famous people in a line... but it becomes apparent that they are not actually in the line together. It's some sort of magic of film... like Catherine Z Jones in the T-Mobile spots. The celebs are really mannered and awful and somehow condescending. just standing and waiting... this must be some do-gooder spot.

Ah...It's a voting booth.

Wait a damned minute, people.

They're saying that we should spend our time in a line to vote but they can't even get it together to work out being in the same fucking room long enough to do a public service spot.

You motherfucking hypocrites. Ballsy ballsy ballsy.


Sunday, October 22, 2006

rambling update

There has been a paucity of whining here. It must mean that I'm back and enjoying myself. That would be a yes.

The weather here is just beautiful. It's definitely fall and that is always a drag, but at least it's 80 degrees and I'm wearing short pants.

I've been spending money like it's going out of style. And, if i keep it up, it will be out of style. But I bought a McBook (some call it a macbook... blech!) and made the switch to apple. got a big dick 23" dell monitor to use with it at home, etc. Pretty nutty. And, I'm going to be spending a boatload (to me, at least) on our first vacation ever. It will also be our honeymoon.

Corey-oke is playing every Tuesday night in November at the The Joint in L.A.

Spamscam will not be playing Chicago in November. Probably February. We'll see.

Working with a friend on a script idea. It's way early. We shall see.

I've been doing a whole lot of nothing.

For my birthday last year (dec 25) Jessie bought me a massage at Burke/Williams. We finally went today.

I don't know, there's something about that place that just seems like a scam. I think they fuck over everyone. The Massueses ass well ass the customers. I imaging that a Massuese probably only gets 30-40 for a massage they charge 120 bucks for. It's a racket.

It certainly is nice sitting in the Yahoozi and the steam room and the water pressure in the showers is truly amazing. Carr's wife, Marion, who is a massuese, spoiled me. She knew exactly how to go realllllly deep in my back. The woman today was pretty much average.

When I went to "check out"... see... that's what I mean... they call settling the bill "checking out", like it was all schmanzy fancy. The place is bullshit. There's something very sinister about it. Not complaining. Just making an observation. So... When I went to check out, it turns out that Jessie had bought me the deluxe 80 minute pound the fuck out of you depth charge massage. I had showed the gift cert. to them when I arrived and they didn't mention it then. The attitude of the girl afterwards was "oh well, sucks to be you" and vaguely suggested I leave the 80 bucks as a tip for the massuesse, which I was thinking of doing because I'm pretty sure they don't even pay her parking. "We treat these like cash" but I had an extra 30 bucks and they won't give the cash. She suggested I buy something... one of their stuffed cancer bears or something. I don't know. It's a weird place with great water pressure and lots of towels.


Be that as it may...

The unintended consequence of Minneapolis is that I dropped all the weight and then some that I gained last year when we begain looking for houses.

I got postcards made up to send to directors and producers I've worked with over the years that say "dean cameron: still alive".

We'll see how that goes over.

That is all. Trying not to whine and complain.

So much less to whine and complain about here... tis true... so true...

Shortbus - Spoilers included

Shortbus is the kind of movie I'm glad was made but utltimately doesn't help our cause. Or, I'm a square.

Here are the problems I had with it:

1. everyone's really beautiful
2. no one talks like that, except for people doing movies about sexuality in new york city
3. if they're so open and free and sex positive, how come the song at the end connotates anal sex with death. i.e. it's a bad thing.

Years ago, I was talking with some actor friends and I came to the conclusion that if we really wanted to be edgy and honest, hardcore sex in a movie would be the coolest and most honest thing to do. So, that's very cool. Plus, the papier mache city is really, really cool (and a great cost saving alternative to doing flyovers in manhattan (hi, that baseball player whose name i don't know but wish i did so i
could've yelled it out during the movie when they were flying into buildings) )

I don't get why if you're going to have a salon/orgy palace like Shortbus, everyone has to dress up. Why do you have to have your backup singers hanging upside down? Why all the affectation?

these characters:

1. The uptight asian sex therapist who has never had an orgasm and
2. her closeted gay husband
3. the beautiful but suicidal young gay man with a past
4. the dumb actor boyfriend
5. the flamboyant, acid tounged sexually ambiguous host ("It's like the sixties but with less hope, honey!")
6. the s&m worker who longs for a simple life


are so obvious... and the story is, too.

Oh, brownouts... I bet she has an orgasm and the lights go on.... Check.

This is an emperor has no clothes movie. If you don't like it you have issues. It's impossible to critique.

"them: See, you have issues. Us people who like sex think this is a really important movie."

I do like sex, but does one have to like a movie's subject to enjoy the movie?

You're trapped by the subject like with something like Schindler's List: It's an important subject, but if you don't like the movie, you're a nazi.

And... why does free sexual expression always involve whipping, food, tattoos, singing the national anthem into someone's asshole and dressing up?

"See, people dress up and have sex because it's fun. You're obviously a square."


The other "out" of Shortbus is: "Well, it's a movie... it's a fantasy..."

If they were so free with their sexuality, why did all the women hole themselves up in a room away from everyone and then talk about sex and then exclude the hot asian babe and the "punky" girl for how they felt about sex?

On the other hand, I will tell everyone I know to see it. I mean, it opens with a shot of the statue of liberty, right? That's great.

It's an important movie and deserves to be seen, but again, I think that ultimately, it doesn't help we who love freedom because it is so exclusive.

That's all.

Thursday, October 12, 2006


so my toshiba laptop screen went goodbye. when i'm home i "expand" the desktop onto another monitor, so now i'm just using the external monitor as my main space. it's a drag.

we want to purchase some property out of state and i suppose we can still do it, but i don't like spending lots of money all at once.

jessie just got the big dick mac pro with a billion gig of ram, etc. and a sleek monitor, so i decided that i can switch to mac so i bought a big cock macbook or McBook as i will be calling it... cough

i also went and coughed up a pile of cash for a dell 24" monitor.

i can run xp on the mcbook for the one program which doesn't have a mac counterpart: the karaoke building thing.

speaking of Coreyoke, we're playing every tuesday in November at the The Joint and I think we've got some gig on the 21st of rocktober. i'm looking forward to playing music out, even if i do have to wear a stupid wig and a members only jacket. it's nice not worrying that i don't look cool, though.

jessie and i are hoping to take a vacation the first week in december. it will be our honeymoon and first vacation ever. looking for a good deal in hawaii on maui or kawuaiiaiaaiaia'i.

thank you nfl commercial.

speaking of cold, it's snowing in minneapolis today and that makes me laugh. it was hot here in l.a. and it was so nice to be too warm. it's the best thing in the world.

i did a v.o. for two pg&e radio spots right when i got back so it was nice to get back into the swing o' things.

now i'm preparing all my files on my pc that i'll slide over to the McBook.

I don't like the interface on the macs. they bug me. the way the screens don't fill up the fuckign screen when you hit maximize is completely lame. i think there's some workaround program, but still, when you think maximize you think "maximum space available".

ford vs. chevy. it's the same thing. it doesn't matter.

the thing will be obsolete within the year.

it's snowing in minneapolis. hahahoooo!

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

I'm totally serious

I like being in L.A. more than being in Minneapolis.

I'm sure you were curious. Just wanted to make sure you knew.

Monday, October 02, 2006

home again...

As paul simon once wrote: gee, it's good to be back home.

The weather is perfect and it's a religious holiday so many religious people are home so there is no traffic.


Sunday, October 01, 2006

Of course

It's the most beautiful day ever in Minneapolis. Thank you for the lovely send-off!

Another myspace thing: someone wrote "tell us how you really feel..." regarding my myspace ranty thing.

Okay... I think that "Tell me how you really feel..." is so horrible. It's that desperate hipster Jack Black detachment that keeps people safe from really feeling something. If someone is disturbed by something and you say "tell me how you really feel" then you're not dealing with what they're saying. You're "being funny". But you're not really being funny, you're dismissing the other person's, well, feelings.

So, being the glutton for punishment I am, I wrote back to this person who wrote "Tell us how you really feel..." saying "I did." and nothing else.

She writes back "Sarcasm at its worst."

How nuts is that? Someone who writes the worst sort sarcasm one can write says my response is the worst sort of sarcasm.

This has got to be the most annoying thing to read in the world. Crimony.

After a couple of hours of extremely close examination, I've noticed that there's an inordinate amount of lint in my navel. I'll post several photos and video soon.